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good morning january. first day of the year and the air is crisp, the sky fades from blue to white, the windows are wet around the edges and all seems calm. quite the opposite to last night, the air was smoke filled, sky was dark- lit up with lights and fireworks, people were lairy and dressed to celebrate. no-one's out this morning, all tucked up in bed with hangovers i suspect.
so i saw the new year in with my family (of course), alcohol, party poppers and streamers. my new years eve's are usually quite family orientated, as is the whole christmas festivities, but i think i might go out on the town next year. we drove around town after we'd been to my uncles house and people were banging on the rooves of cars and stumbling around the town and wishing everyone a happy new year. it was nice; in a wierd, drunken kind of way.
my plans for change don't go into action in a few days or a few weeks or when i go back to school; but they start now. today. as soon as that clock struck midnight and glasses chinked together and everyone was kissing and hugging. that's the new year. thats when resolutions start to take place.
seeing as this year i'm going to change my attitude because i have the personality of someone that would say "ahh, i cant be bothered, i'll do it later", so last night at midnight i was determined to think "no. i wont start when i feel like it. i will do it now!" so i'm ploughing on with my changes and hopes.
although i thought i need to stop being so lazy, i didnt get out of bed this afternoon untill half past one. i thought that was quite outrageous so i did some things to make me feel better. i tidied my room and ate some healthy food- two things i need to do all year round. i make myself sound quite bizzare and obsessive, but thats just the way i am. from now on, if i decide to do something, i wont chicken out, i'll get it done.
it's all well and good saying that you'll put your mind to something, but making it last a whole year is an entirely different thing. one week, even one month could seem a struggle, but this for me is something worth doing, something i feel i need to do and more importantly, something i want to do. so if anyone sees these rapid changes and starts to complain, they can take a step back and look at it through my eyes. all of these things are changes for the better and i'm sure everyone has made some kind of resolution or hope for the future; and if people start to see me, or anyone for that matter, changing but they've stayed the same, maybe it's not because we're 'pretending' or all those other things people would throw at someone, but maybe it's because we've kept my mind set on achieving something we want. can you say thats something that you've done? or even thought about doing? so before people start to fall out with friends or family for whatever reasons, keep that in your mind and i'm sure you'll have a happier, drama-free year than one's you've kept a narrow mind about and never actually stepped back and wondered about the possibilities.